Kanpur is the second most populous city in Uttar Pradesh, after Lucknow and there isn’t a single stereotypical joke we aren’t aware of! To begin with, we don’t hate it when people make stereotypical jokes on UP’wale but we do have a problem with the intentions behind it. There are personal attacks masked as jokes which are intended to demean or intimidate people and we have had enough already! Basically the mapping of your region to your characteristics.
Below we’ve mentioned 5 major stereotypes which need to be done away with, right away.
Surviving on Gutkhas, Suttas and Tambaku!
Yes, we’re from Kanpur and we aren’t into a staple diet of gutkhas, khaini and other saste nashe. We exist! No, we don’t fight criminals by spitting paan juice in their eyes and people have to understand that irrespective of their region, many people are into these injurious chewables too. Sab nahi Laxman!
Katta is our pepper spray!
Just to defend ourselves or to prove a point, we just don’t randomly take out guns from our pockets and randomly start open firing! This shit is illegal and we don’t have vidhayak chachas to save our asses from such debacles. We’re middle class folks, carrying Boroline and chewing gums in our pockets.
Our Angrezi isn't your business!
Yes, we agree that most of us do not have a Tharoorian command over angrezi but hey, there’s hardly any exchange of dialogue in English among friends and family. The overall premises of our state is nowhere conducive for English speakers!
We hesitate and we stutter a bit and often have that desi accent pitching in while we converse and it is not because we are Kanpuriyas! It’s just our general conversational habits which don’t usually include perfect pronunciations and stellar vocabulary. We have our own words and they confess our true feelings.
We do agree on this one, partially. Kanpur is indeed dirty in some areas but hey, there are places where it’s spick and span, better than other small scale cities. Even cities like Lucknow, Mumbai, Delhi and so on are cloaked in dirt in a lot of areas so don’t blame the citizens here. It’s more of a deep-rooted governmental shortfall, which we can all agree upon.
Well, we aren’t exactly rude but our tolerance levels for stupidity is really damn low. We’re मुँहफट and we know it but you know what they say? Kanpuriyas are like coconuts- hardened from the outside, difficult to crack but once you taste our inner selves, you’ll never know a better friendship than ours.
So overall if you’re ever here, we hope that you can un-learn some of these stereotypes and explore the city and the people, with an open mind.